That’s okay. You don’t have to kiss them until you’re ready.
Let me say that again because it matters. If you walk into St. Michael’s and see everyone kissing icons and you feel weird about it, you can simply bow your head, make the sign of the cross, or just stand there quietly. Nobody’s going to chase you down. This isn’t a test you can fail.
But let’s talk about why we do it, because understanding helps.
Why we kiss icons
When Orthodox Christians kiss an icon, we’re not kissing paint and wood. We’re greeting the person depicted. It’s like kissing a photograph of someone you love, the affection passes through the image to the actual person. The Seventh Ecumenical Council settled this back in 787. The honor shown to an icon goes to the prototype, the person portrayed. That’s not idolatry. It’s veneration.
Here’s the thing: the Incarnation changed everything. When the Word became flesh, God made matter holy. He took on a body. He could be seen, touched, depicted. Icons testify to that reality. Christ had a face. His mother held him. Thomas put his hand in his side. If God became material enough to be crucified, he can be painted.
So when we kiss an icon of Christ or the Theotokos or St. Michael, we’re affirming the Incarnation with our bodies. We’re not worshiping the board. We’re honoring the saint, asking their prayers, remembering that they’re alive in Christ and that the Church includes both the living and the dead.
But I’m still uncomfortable
Fair enough. Most people coming from Baptist or non-denominational backgrounds feel that way at first. You’ve spent years hearing that images in church are dangerous. That’s a hard thing to unlearn, and it won’t happen overnight.
Start small. Stand before an icon and just look. Read the name. Say a short prayer. “Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for me.” Or “St. Michael, pray for us.” You don’t have to kiss anything. Make the sign of the cross if you want. Bow slightly if that feels natural. Or don’t.
Watch what others do. Not to copy them mechanically, but to see that this is normal for us. It’s not weird or superstitious. It’s how we greet the saints. In Southeast Texas, we shake hands or hug when we see friends. In church, we kiss icons. Same impulse, different context.
Talk to Fr. Michael or your sponsor if you have one. Tell them you’re struggling with this. Any decent priest will tell you the same thing I’m telling you: take your time. The Church isn’t going to collapse if you don’t kiss an icon today.
What’s the difference between veneration and worship?
This is where Protestant concerns make sense, actually. We should never worship anything but God. That’s latria, the adoration due to the Holy Trinity alone.
What we give to icons is dulia, veneration. It’s honor and respect, not worship. We venerate the cross, too. We venerate the Gospel book. We stand when the priest carries it through the church. We bow. Some kiss it. That doesn’t mean we think the book is God. It means we honor what it represents and who it reveals.
Same with icons. When you kiss an icon of Christ, you’re not worshiping wood. You’re expressing love for Christ through a physical action. Your body participates in your prayer. That’s very Orthodox, we don’t separate body and soul into neat compartments. We’re not Gnostics. We believe matter matters.
Give it time
I know a guy who converted from a Church of Christ background. Took him two years before he could kiss an icon without feeling like he was breaking a commandment. Now he has a prayer corner at home with half a dozen icons and he venerates them every morning. It just took time for his heart to catch up with his head.
You might be the same way. Or you might kiss your first icon next Sunday and feel completely at peace with it. People are different. The Church is patient.
One more thing. If you’re still an inquirer, you’re not expected to do everything we do. You’re watching, learning, asking questions. That’s exactly what you should be doing. Catechumens are further along but still forming. Even new converts are still getting their bearings. All of that is normal.
The icons will still be there next week. And the week after that. They’ve been part of the Church for seventeen centuries. They’re not going anywhere. When you’re ready, you’ll know.
