You’ll face it. That’s the short answer. When you become Orthodox in Southeast Texas, someone’s going to tell you you’ve joined a cult, or that you worship Mary, or that you’re not really Christian anymore. It might be your mom. It could be a coworker at the plant. Sometimes it’s the guy at First Baptist who’s known you since high school.
It stings. But here’s what you need to know: this isn’t new, and you’re not alone.
What You’re Actually Dealing With
Most anti-Orthodox prejudice around here comes from genuine misunderstanding, not malice. Your Baptist aunt sees you kissing an icon and thinks “graven images.” Your Pentecostal coworker hears you mention asking St. Michael’s prayers and thinks you’ve abandoned Jesus. They’re not trying to hurt you. They’re scared for your soul because they love you and they don’t understand what Orthodoxy actually is.
Some of it’s theological. Protestants in the South grew up with “Bible alone” and “just me and Jesus.” Orthodoxy looks Catholic to them, and Catholic means wrong. They don’t have categories for Holy Tradition or the communion of saints. When you try to explain that you’re not worshipping Mary, you’re asking her prayers like you’d ask theirs, they hear word games.
And some of it’s just unfamiliarity. There aren’t Orthodox churches on every corner here like there are Baptist ones. We’re exotic. We’re ethnic. We’ve got beards and incense and we cross ourselves backwards. That’s weird to folks who think church means a praise band and a thirty-minute sermon.
What Not to Do
Don’t get defensive. I know it’s hard when someone questions whether you’re even Christian, but the second you start arguing, you’ve lost. You can’t win someone over by making them feel stupid, and you can’t defend Orthodoxy by attacking their church. That’s not how this works.
Don’t become an Orthodox know-it-all. New converts especially fall into this trap. You’ve discovered this ancient, beautiful faith and you want everyone to know about the Seventh Ecumenical Council and why their church is only 150 years old. Stop. You were where they are six months ago. Have some humility.
Don’t cut people off. Your family might say hurtful things. They might refuse to come to your chrismation or tell you you’re going to hell. You still have to love them. Christ didn’t say “honor your father and mother unless they’re really ignorant about church history.”
What Actually Helps
Live it. This matters more than anything else you’ll do. When your Protestant family sees that you’re more patient, more prayerful, more Christ-like than you were before, that’s your witness. When your coworkers notice you’re fasting but you’re not making a big deal about it, when you speak kindly about people who’ve hurt you, when you show up with food after someone’s surgery, that’s Orthodoxy in action. St. Maximos the Confessor said Mary is an image of theosis, of becoming like Christ. Be that image yourself.
Answer questions simply when they come up. If someone asks about icons, don’t launch into Christology and the Incarnation. Say something like: “Icons are windows into heaven. When I venerate an icon of Christ, I’m honoring Him, not the wood and paint. Same as you’d kiss a photo of your kids, you’re not kissing paper, you’re expressing love for the person.” Then stop talking. Let them think about it.
Be clear about what you believe without being combative. You can say “The Orthodox Church is the Church Christ founded” without adding “and your church is fake.” You can explain that we venerate Mary as the Theotokos, the God-bearer, because she literally gave birth to God incarnate, without mocking Protestants who don’t. Confidence isn’t arrogance. You don’t have to apologize for being Orthodox, but you don’t have to be a jerk about it either.
Keep the relationship bigger than the argument. Your mom’s worried you’re in a cult? Don’t stop calling her. Your brother thinks you worship statues? Still show up for his kid’s birthday party. Invite them to Pascha. Bring them prosphora. Let them see that you haven’t become some weird, isolated religious fanatic. You’ve become more fully Christian, and that includes loving the people who don’t understand yet.
When It Gets Hard
Sometimes people won’t let it go. They’ll keep pushing, keep questioning, keep trying to save you from Orthodoxy. That’s exhausting. You might need to set some boundaries. It’s okay to say “I love you and I respect your faith, but I’m not going to keep having this conversation. I’m Orthodox, and that’s not changing.”
Pray for them. Not in a sanctimonious way, but really pray. Ask the Theotokos to intercede for your family members who think you’re praying to her instead of through her. Ask your patron saint to help soften hearts. This isn’t a battle you can win through arguments. It’s spiritual, and it needs spiritual weapons.
Find support in your parish. Other people there have walked this road. Some of them lost family members over it. Some of them got disowned. Some of them had parents who came around after five years. Talk to them. Let them encourage you. The Church is your family too, and sometimes that family understands what you’re going through better than your blood relatives do.
The Long View
Here’s the thing about prejudice: it usually softens with time. Not always, but usually. When your family sees you’re still you, still love Jesus, still read your Bible, still serve others, just doing it in a liturgical, sacramental way now, most of them will relax. They might never become Orthodox. They might always think you’re a little weird. But the panic fades.
Some of the early Protestants, including Luther and Calvin, affirmed that Mary was ever-virgin. They venerated her differently than we do, but they didn’t think it was heresy. The divide between Protestantism and Orthodoxy is real, but it’s not as absolute as some folks think. You can honor that shared history while being clear about where you stand now.
And remember: the apostles faced worse. They got beaten, imprisoned, killed for following Christ. You’re getting awkward questions at Thanksgiving. Keep perspective. This is uncomfortable, not persecution. You can handle uncomfortable.
If you need something concrete to share with family who’s genuinely trying to understand, there’s a book called “Living Faith: An Orthodox Christian Conversation with Evangelicals” that explains our faith without being confrontational. Sometimes people need to read it themselves rather than hear it from you. That’s okay. Plant seeds. Let God give the growth.
You’re going to be fine. Stay rooted in the Church, keep loving the people who misunderstand you, and trust that the Holy Spirit is working even when you can’t see it. Orthodoxy has survived 2,000 years of actual persecution. It can survive your uncle thinking you’ve gone Catholic.
